{"id":2662,"date":"2019-11-21T03:08:12","date_gmt":"2019-11-21T03:08:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/project\/episode-fifteen-crushes\/"},"modified":"2026-05-19T16:00:51","modified_gmt":"2026-05-19T16:00:51","slug":"episode-fifteen-crushes","status":"publish","type":"project","link":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/project\/episode-fifteen-crushes\/","title":{"rendered":"Episodio 15: Flechazos"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>[et_pb_section fb_built=\u00bb1&#8243; admin_label=\u00bbsection\u00bb _builder_version=\u00bb3.22&#8243;][et_pb_row admin_label=\u00bbrow\u00bb _builder_version=\u00bb3.25&#8243; background_size=\u00bbinitial\u00bb background_position=\u00bbtop_left\u00bb background_repeat=\u00bbrepeat\u00bb][et_pb_column type=\u00bb4_4&#8243; _builder_version=\u00bb3.25&#8243; custom_padding=\u00bb|||\u00bb custom_padding__hover=\u00bb|||\u00bb][et_pb_post_title meta=\u00bboff\u00bb _builder_version=\u00bb4.4.8&#8243;][\/et_pb_post_title][et_pb_text admin_label=\u00bbText\u00bb _builder_version=\u00bb4.4.8&#8243; background_size=\u00bbinitial\u00bb background_position=\u00bbtop_left\u00bb background_repeat=\u00bbrepeat\u00bb hover_enabled=\u00bb0&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p>La obsesi\u00f3n y el enamoramiento pueden ser algo positivo, pero depende de qui\u00e9n sea el enamorado y de qui\u00e9n sea el objeto del enamoramiento. Si es Siddhartha de quien est\u00e1s enamorado, tienes mucha suerte. Tener ese sentimiento hacia alguien sublime significa que tienes buen gusto y un buen v\u00ednculo k\u00e1rmico.<\/p>\n<p>A veces nos enamoramos de las personas menos compatibles y esto se debe a esa conexi\u00f3n k\u00e1rmica. Muchas veces nos enamoramos de personas que nos hacen polvo. Simplemente caemos en sus redes, como un mosquito volando al matamoscas el\u00e9ctrico. Otras veces nos enamoramos de personas que nos llevan por el buen camino. A veces tenemos el karma para enamorarnos de personas que nos hacen polvo y adem\u00e1s nos llevan por el buen camino, lo cual no es nada malo. Y a veces eres t\u00fa el objeto del enamoramiento y sin querer podr\u00edas hacer polvo a alguien. O podr\u00edas llevarle por el buen camino.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-312\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/9f64d5692f217ce7d86da26171cf6fee-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"480\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/9f64d5692f217ce7d86da26171cf6fee-1.jpg 640w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/9f64d5692f217ce7d86da26171cf6fee-1-300x225.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>He tenido unos cuantos flechazos en mi vida. Y como mucha gente, a menudo me he enamorado de gente que no hab\u00eda conocido nunca, gente que era esquiva, que estaba fuera de mi alcance o completamente prohibida, como la madre del Rinpoch\u00e9 que mencion\u00e9 <a href=\"http:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/es\/project\/episode-seven-loss-of-innocence\/\">antes<\/a>. As\u00ed es como funciona el karma. Ir\u00f3nicamente, puede que haya tenido m\u00e1s flechazos que nadie ya que se supon\u00eda que no deb\u00eda tenerlos. Se supon\u00eda que yo era un lama, una reencarnaci\u00f3n, un tulku, que estaba por encima de los seres humanos normales y corrientes. La gente que me rodeaba quer\u00eda protegerme de las distracciones. Pensaban que era su deber crear una distancia entre m\u00ed y los objetos de los que me enamoraba y asegurarse de que yo ve\u00eda a las mujeres como un estorbo, en el mejor de los casos, y como posibles creadoras de problemas. Supongo que la mente humana tiende a querer lo que est\u00e1 prohibido porque nada de esto consigui\u00f3 convencerme. Siempre he sentido curiosidad por las mujeres y el romance. La fruta prohibida es siempre la m\u00e1s dulce.<\/p>\n<p>Mis mentores me dieron opiniones muy contradictorias sobre las mujeres. La mayor\u00eda de ellos denigraba a las mujeres y las pintaba como si fueran las malas de la pel\u00edcula, en especial los mentores mon\u00e1sticos que practicaban la renuncia a la vida familiar. Ellos personalmente hac\u00edan todo lo que pod\u00edan para evitar el deseo y las distracciones de las relaciones, y al ser as\u00ed como viv\u00edan sus vidas, naturalmente es lo que predicaron, como un vegetariano promueve el vegetarianismo. Era su costumbre. Fue lo que hicieron. Supongo que si yo fuese una mujer Rinpoch\u00e9, ellos habr\u00edan predicado que los hombres son distracciones, tal y como se supone que deben pensar las monjas. Por otro lado, algunos de mis mentores, que eran yoguis, me ense\u00f1aron que denigrar a las mujeres era un error. Recuerdo que uno de mis mentores, un yogui llamado Lama Kunga que era disc\u00edpulo de Lama Gangshar, me dijo que incluso un mero mech\u00f3n de pelo de mujer pose\u00eda miles de millones de ciudades de dakinis.<\/p>\n<p>Sin embargo, parece que en todo el mundo, y especialmente en Asia, existe esa actitud de que las mujeres son inferiores. Incluso hoy en d\u00eda, en ciertos monasterios, especialmente en lugares como But\u00e1n, las mujeres tienen prohibido entrar a ciertas salas de meditaci\u00f3n dedicadas a los protectores del dharma, como la sala de Majakali. Es comprensible que un monasterio excluya a las mujeres, ya que es como un internado de ni\u00f1os. Pero es ir\u00f3nico que impidan que las mujeres entren al santuario de Majakali en particular porque Majakali es la mujer por excelencia. Creo que esto es absolutamente una cuesti\u00f3n cultural que est\u00e1 perjudicando al Budadharma.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-314\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/6247685956_c50bcf9be1_b-1024x768.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"768\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/6247685956_c50bcf9be1_b.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/6247685956_c50bcf9be1_b-300x225.jpg 300w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/6247685956_c50bcf9be1_b-768x576.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Mis mentores desconfiaban especialmente de las mujeres occidentales, las llamaban \u201cchicas inyi\u201d [1]. Simplemente no sab\u00edan c\u00f3mo tratarlas cuando se paseaban con su pelo rubio, ojos azules y piel clara, vistiendo ropa provocativa como pantalones vaqueros. Los lamas estaban acostumbrados a ver a chicas tibetanas\u00a0con ojos t\u00edmidos y abatidos y trajes acolchados que parec\u00edan grandes mantas. Incluso las faldas largas que llevaban las mujeres occidentales pod\u00edan resultar sugerentes. Era su lenguaje corporal, la forma en que te miraban directamente a los ojos, porque esa es la forma educada de hacerlo en occidente. Con lo cual, seg\u00fan los lamas, las mujeres occidentales eran peligrosas y sus advertencias no cesaban nunca. Estaban convencidos de que las chicas inyi estaban arruinando a los tulkus. Pero estad\u00edsticamente eso no es cierto. Muchos m\u00e1s tulkus terminaron escap\u00e1ndose con mujeres asi\u00e1ticas. Pero exist\u00eda este tipo de prejuicio.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-315\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/ANNAPURNA-NEPAL-Three-Tibetan-women-in-traditional-dresses.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1000\" height=\"681\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/ANNAPURNA-NEPAL-Three-Tibetan-women-in-traditional-dresses.jpg 1000w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/ANNAPURNA-NEPAL-Three-Tibetan-women-in-traditional-dresses-300x204.jpg 300w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/ANNAPURNA-NEPAL-Three-Tibetan-women-in-traditional-dresses-768x523.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Con toda esta propaganda de que el deseo no era bueno y que las mujeres deb\u00edan evitarse, tuve que aprender a fingir que no estaba interesado. Aprend\u00ed a ser discreto. Aunque era meticuloso cuando sal\u00edamos, siempre en guardia, atento de no mirar a las mujeres y de parecer desinteresado cuando se me acercaban, mis mentores y los monjes mayores se burlaban de m\u00ed sin cesar e insinuaban que estaba mirando a las chicas. Para un ni\u00f1o en crecimiento, esto fomentaba una sensaci\u00f3n de verg\u00fcenza en torno al tema de las mujeres.<\/p>\n<p>Creo que ser\u00eda beneficioso que los mentores y gu\u00edas dieran a los j\u00f3venes lamas y tulkus clases de educaci\u00f3n sexual y cuestiones de g\u00e9nero. Podr\u00edan seguir explicando las distracciones que ello conlleva, pero tambi\u00e9n podr\u00edan ense\u00f1ar c\u00f3mo respetar a las mujeres y c\u00f3mo comunicarse con el sexo opuesto. Esto falta por completo en el entrenamiento actual de los tulkus.<\/p>\n<p>Despu\u00e9s de las mujeres, el cine era lo m\u00e1s censurado. Cuando miro hacia atr\u00e1s, puedo solidarizarme con mis mentores por ser tan cautelosos con las pel\u00edculas, especialmente las pel\u00edculas indias, que estaban llenas de historias y canciones rom\u00e1nticas, plantando ideas en la mente de los j\u00f3venes monjes y rinpoch\u00e9s. Muchos de estos monjes mayores probablemente nunca hab\u00edan visto a hombres y mujeres bailando y abraz\u00e1ndose hasta que fueron al cine. A pesar de que en esos d\u00edas no hab\u00eda besos y mucho menos escenas expl\u00edcitas, era indignante para ellos. Muchos tulkus, monjes y rinpoch\u00e9s eran susceptibles a ese reino fant\u00e1stico. Realmente pod\u00edan imaginarse a s\u00ed mismos teniendo una pareja rom\u00e1ntica bailando bajo la lluvia, revolc\u00e1ndose entre las flores. Por supuesto que yo tambi\u00e9n me dej\u00e9 llevar por eso.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-316\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/images.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"249\" height=\"203\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Una de las mayores dificultades a las que se enfrentaban los maestros de disciplina y los abades era evitar que los monjes m\u00e1s j\u00f3venes se escabullesen al cine a ver pel\u00edculas. Hay una historia muy graciosa de Chatrul Rinpoch\u00e9, cuando estaba estableciendo su monasterio en Darjeeling en los 70, pillando a sus monjes cuando se escapaban al cine por las noches. Si Chatrul Rinpoch\u00e9 se enteraba, entraba al cine en medio de la pel\u00edcula y alumbraba con una linterna el\u00e9ctrica al p\u00fablico en busca de sus monjes para poder arrastrarlos de regreso al monasterio.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-317\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/17687_10153376758397410_1657393514594547518_n.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/17687_10153376758397410_1657393514594547518_n.jpg 400w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/17687_10153376758397410_1657393514594547518_n-225x300.jpg 225w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Uno de mis primeros y m\u00e1s profundos flechazos fue la actriz india Zeenat Aman. Yo viv\u00eda en el templo del palacio de Sikkim, rodeado de tutores y asistentes. Me alojaba en el piso de arriba y en el de abajo estaba Khandro Tsering Ch\u00f6dron. El ba\u00f1o tambi\u00e9n estaba abajo. Solo me dejaban salir de mi habitaci\u00f3n para ir al ba\u00f1o. De vez en cuando me permit\u00edan salir del templo y caminar por el palacio. Esa era una se\u00f1al de que mis mentores estaban de buen humor. Ir al cine era impensable.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-318\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/maxresdefault-1024x576.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"576\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/maxresdefault-1024x576.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/maxresdefault-300x169.jpg 300w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/maxresdefault-768x432.jpg 768w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/maxresdefault-1080x608.jpg 1080w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/maxresdefault.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>A veces, hab\u00eda grandes pujas en Khyentse Labrang y ven\u00edan monjes de todos sitios. Esto me dio la oportunidad de conocer a algunos monjes m\u00e1s j\u00f3venes que me contaban sobre las pel\u00edculas de Bollywood que hab\u00edan visto y los riesgos que corrieron. Hablaban de much\u00edsimas \u00a0pel\u00edculas. Hab\u00eda una llamada <em>Bobby<\/em>. Y una pel\u00edcula llamada <em>Laila Majnu<\/em>, pero la que m\u00e1s me interesaba era <em>Satyam Shivam Sundaram<\/em> protagonizada por Zeenat Aman. No ten\u00eda la m\u00e1s m\u00ednima oportunidad de ir a verla, solo pod\u00eda escuchar lo que los monjes contaban. Les rogu\u00e9 que me contaran la historia un mill\u00f3n de veces, una y otra vez. Cada monje ten\u00eda una versi\u00f3n diferente, por lo que nunca me cansaba. Algunos de los monjes consiguieron pasar de contrabando algunas fotos de las estrellas de cine y me las ofrecieron. Ahora bien, esto era peligroso, mucho m\u00e1s peligroso que los tebeos. Tuve que esconder estas fotos en lugares especiales, tanto que apenas ten\u00eda la oportunidad de siquiera mirarlas. El simple hecho de saber que ten\u00eda las im\u00e1genes en alg\u00fan lugar me emocionaba. Hab\u00eda otras actrices populares como Hema Malini y Madhu Bala, pero yo era un fan incondicional de Zeenat Aman. Llam\u00e9moslo v\u00ednculo k\u00e1rmico, deuda k\u00e1rmica, ten\u00eda un sentido de lealtad hacia ella, me sent\u00eda culpable si miraba fotos de otras actrices.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-319\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/47428888.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"600\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/47428888.jpg 600w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/47428888-150x150.jpg 150w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/47428888-300x300.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Cuando Kyabje Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoch\u00e9 y Dudjom Rinpoch\u00e9 estaban dando transmisiones, a veces pod\u00edan durar 10 horas por d\u00eda y no nos permit\u00edan quedarnos dormidos, ten\u00edamos que escuchar el texto que se estaba leyendo. Debo confesar que muchas veces mi mente estaba llena de historias cinematogr\u00e1ficas. Y, a menudo, me proyectaba a m\u00ed mismo como el h\u00e9roe, el protagonista rom\u00e1ntico revolc\u00e1ndome por los campos en flor con Zeenat Aman. Todav\u00eda tengo esa costumbre, pero en lugar de cantar bajo la lluvia, hoy en d\u00eda es algo m\u00e1s serio como imaginarme sentado en la Oficina Oval como presidente de los Estados Unidos, resolviendo los problemas del mundo.<\/p>\n<p>Pero mi v\u00ednculo k\u00e1rmico con Zeenat Aman se acab\u00f3 cuando el v\u00ednculo k\u00e1rmico con otra mujer floreci\u00f3. De alguna forma consegu\u00ed una foto de una chica europea y Zeenat qued\u00f3 completamente olvidada de golpe. No fue hasta varios a\u00f1os despu\u00e9s que descubr\u00ed que la chica de la foto era la actriz italiana Claudia Cardinale. Ese flechazo nunca ha terminado, la verdad. Incluso hoy en d\u00eda, cuando encargo thangkas de Tara y Vajrayogini, les pido que las hagan inspiradas en Claudia Cardinale.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-320\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/claudia-C-1024x368.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"368\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/claudia-C-1024x368.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/claudia-C-300x108.jpg 300w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/claudia-C-768x276.jpg 768w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/claudia-C-1080x388.jpg 1080w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/claudia-C.jpg 1114w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Fue la foto de Claudia Cardinale la que me llev\u00f3 al castigo m\u00e1s duro de mi infancia. A pesar de todas las advertencias, amonestaciones y rega\u00f1os, las mujeres y el cine se colaron en mi vida. Los sermones y los rega\u00f1os no terminaron nunca una vez que encontraron su foto escondida bajo las l\u00e1minas de mi tarima.<\/p>\n<p>Aunque nunca podr\u00e9 declararme como una consumada persona espiritual, como m\u00ednimo tengo una conexi\u00f3n con el Buda y el dharma. Me gusta pensar que a trav\u00e9s de mis flechazos por Zeenat Aman y Claudia Cardinale, ellas tambi\u00e9n podr\u00edan eventualmente estar conectadas con el Buda y el dharma.<\/p>\n<p>[1] Chicas \u201cinyi\u201d proviene de la palabra tibetana <em>inyique<\/em>, persona de habla inglesa.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-321\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/8k95w1iix2dz-1024x529.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"529\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/8k95w1iix2dz-1024x529.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/8k95w1iix2dz-300x155.jpg 300w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/8k95w1iix2dz-768x397.jpg 768w, https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/8k95w1iix2dz-1080x558.jpg 1080w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_divider _builder_version=\u00bb4.4.8&#8243; custom_padding=\u00bb30px||||false|false\u00bb][\/et_pb_divider][et_pb_post_nav _builder_version=\u00bb4.4.8&#8243; width=\u00bb85.3%\u00bb custom_margin=\u00bb|-108px||-80px||\u00bb custom_padding=\u00bb|31px||||\u00bb border_radii=\u00bboff||||\u00bb][\/et_pb_post_nav][et_pb_comments _builder_version=\u00bb4.4.8&#8243;][\/et_pb_comments][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>La obsesi\u00f3n y el enamoramiento pueden ser algo positivo, pero depende de qui\u00e9n sea el enamorado y de qui\u00e9n sea el objeto del enamoramiento. Si es Siddhartha de quien est\u00e1s enamorado, tienes mucha suerte. Tener ese sentimiento hacia alguien sublime significa que tienes buen gusto y un buen v\u00ednculo k\u00e1rmico. A veces nos enamoramos de [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":890,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"Obsession and infatuation can be positive but it depends on who is infatuated and the person who is the object of infatuation. If you are infatuated by Siddhartha, you are very lucky. To have that feeling toward someone sublime means you have good taste and a good karmic link.\r\n\r\nWe get infatuated by some of the most unlikely people and this is because of those karmic connections. Many times we become infatuated by people who will destroy us. We just fall for those things, like a mosquito jumping to the electric zapper. Other times we get infatuated by people who take us in the right direction. Sometimes we have karma to be infatuated by people who <em>both<\/em> destroy us and lead us in the right direction, which isn\u2019t a bad thing. And sometimes you are the object of the infatuation and without trying you might destroy them. Or you might lead them in the right direction.\r\n\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-312\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/9f64d5692f217ce7d86da26171cf6fee-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"480\" \/>\r\n\r\nI have had so many crushes in my life. And like a lot of people, I often had crushes on people who I'd never met, people who were elusive, out of my league, or completely off limits, like the mother of the Rinpoche I mentioned <a href=\"ttp:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/project\/episode-seven-loss-of-innocence\/\">before<\/a>. Such are the workings of karma. Ironically, I may have had more crushes than most because I was not supposed to have crushes. I was supposed to be a lama, an incarnation, a tulku, above ordinary human beings. The people surrounding me wanted to protect me from distractions. They thought it was their duty to distance me from the objects of crushes and to make sure I viewed women as hindrances, at best, and as possible obstacle makers. I guess the human mind is prone to wanting what is prohibited because none of this managed to sway me. I have always been curious about women and romance. The forbidden fruit is the sweetest.\r\n\r\nMy tutors gave me very contradictory views about women. Most of them really denigrated women and painted them as villains, especially the monastic tutors who were practicing renunciation of household life. They personally did everything they could to avoid desire and the distractions of relationships and since that was how they lived their lives, they naturally preached it, like a vegetarian promotes vegetarianism. It was their habit. It was what they did. I suppose that if I was a woman Rinpoche, they might have preached men are distractions, just like nuns are supposed to think. On the other hand, a few of my tutors, who were yogis, taught me that denigrating women was a defect. I remember one of my tutors, a yogi named Lama Kunga, who was a disciple of Lama Gangshar, told me that even a single lock of a woman\u2019s hair had billions of cities of dakinis.\r\n\r\nYet it seems that all over the world, especially in Asia, there is this cultural attitude that women are inferior. Even today at certain monasteries, especially in places like Bhutan, women are barred from certain protector shrine rooms like the Mahakali room. It is understandable for a monastery to exclude women, since it\u2019s like a boys hostel. But it is ironic that they prevent women from entering the Mahakali shrine in particular because Mahakali is the most supreme woman herself. I believe this is absolutely a cultural thing that is staining the Buddhadharma.\r\n\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-314\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/6247685956_c50bcf9be1_b-1024x768.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"768\" \/>\r\n\r\nMy tutors were especially wary of western women, \u201cIngie girls\u201d they called them. They just didn\u2019t know how to relate to them walking around with their light hair, blue eyes and fair skin, wearing revealing clothes like jeans. The lamas were used to seeing Tibetan girls in fluffy costumes that looked like big blankets with shy downcast eyes. Even the long skirts Western women wore could be suggestive. It was their body language, the way they looked directly in your eyes, because that\u2019s the polite way to do it in the west. So in the eyes of the lamas Western women were dangerous and the warnings never stopped. They were convinced that tulkus were being ruined by Ingie girls. But statistically that\u2019s not true. Many more tulkus ended up running off with Asian women. But there was this kind of prejudice.\r\n\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-315\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/ANNAPURNA-NEPAL-Three-Tibetan-women-in-traditional-dresses.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1000\" height=\"681\" \/>\r\n\r\nWith all this propaganda that desire was not good and women should be avoided, I had to learn to pretend that I wasn\u2019t interested. I learned how to be discrete. Even though I was meticulous when we went out\u2014always on guard, careful not to look at women and to appear disinterested when they approached me\u2014my tutors and the older monks would tease me endlessly and insinuate that I was eyeing girls. For a growing child, this cultivated a sense of embarrassment around the topic of women.\r\n\r\nI think it would be beneficial if the tutors and guides gave young lamas and tulkus a tutorial on sex education and gender issues. They could continue to explain about the distractions involved, but they could also train how to respect women and how to communicate with the opposite sex. This is totally missing in tulku training today.\r\n\r\nThe next most prohibited thing after women was the cinema. Looking back, I can sympathize with my tutors for being so wary of films, especially Indian films, which were full of romantic storylines and songs, planting ideas in the minds of young monks and rinpoches. Many of these older monks probably had never seen men and women dancing and hugging until they went to a film. Even though in those days there was no kissing, let alone explicit scenes, it was outrageous to them. Many tulkus, monks and Rinpoches were susceptible to that fantastical realm. They really could imagine themselves having a romantic partner dancing in the rain, rolling around in the flowers. Of course I ended up becoming swept up in that that too.\r\n\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-316\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/images.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"249\" height=\"203\" \/>\r\n\r\nOne of the biggest struggles the discipline masters and abbots faced was preventing the younger monks from sneaking out to the cinema and watching films. There is a very funny story of Chatrul Rinpoche, who was starting his meditation center in Darjeeling in the 1970s, catching his monks who\u2019d sneaked out to the cinema in the evenings. If Chatrul Rinpoche found out, he would come into the theater in the middle of the film and shine a bright electric torch at the audience looking for his monks so he could drag them back to the center.\r\n\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-317\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/17687_10153376758397410_1657393514594547518_n.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"533\" \/>\r\n\r\nOne of my first and strongest crushes was the Indian actress Zeenat Aman. I was living in the chapel at the palace of Sikkim, surrounded by tutors and attendants. I lived upstairs and downstairs was Khandro Tshering Ch\u00f6dron. The bathroom was also downstairs. The only time I was allowed out of my room was when I went to the toilet. Occasionally I was allowed to leave the chapel and walk around the palace. This was a sign that my tutors were in a good mood. Going out to the movies was unthinkable.\r\n\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-318\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/maxresdefault-1024x576.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"576\" \/>\r\n\r\nAt times, Khyentse Labrang would do big pujas and monks would come from different places. This was my chance to meet some younger monks and they told me about the Bollywood films they had seen and the risks they took to go. There were so many films that they talked about. There was one called <em>Bobby<\/em>. And a film called <em>Laila Majnu <\/em>but the one I was most interested in was <em>Satyam Shivam Sundaram <\/em>starring Zeenat Aman. I had no chance to go see it, I could only hear about it from the monks. I must have begged them to tell me the story so many times, again and again. Each monk had a different version so it never got old. A few of the monks managed to smuggle in a few photos of the films stars and offered them to me. Now this was dangerous, much more dangerous than comic books. I had to hide these photos in special places, so much so that I hardly had a chance to even look at them. Just knowing that I possessed the images somewhere gave me a thrill. There were other popular actresses like Hema Malini and Madhu Bala, but I was a staunch Zeenat Aman fan. Call it karmic link, karmic debt, there was a sense of loyalty toward her, it felt wrong to look at pictures of other actresses.\r\n\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-319\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/47428888.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"600\" \/>\r\n\r\nWhen Kyabje Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche and Dudjom Rinpoche were conferring transmissions, we would have to listen to the text being read. It could sometimes take 10 hours per day and we were not allowed to fall asleep. I have to confess, many times my mind was filled with cinematic stories. Oftentimes, I would cast myself as the romantic hero, rolling in the flowering fields with Zeenat Aman. I still have that habit but instead of singing in the rain, nowadays it\u2019s more serious like imagining I\u2019m sitting in the oval office as the president of the United States, solving the problems of the world.\r\n\r\nMy karmic link with Zeenat Aman exhausted when a karmic link to another woman bloomed. I somehow obtained a photo of a European girl and Zeenat was totally forgotten on the spot. Only many years later I found the girl in the photo was Italian actress Claudia Cardinale. This crush never really stopped. Even today when I commission thangkas of Tara and Vajrayogini, I ask them to fashion them after Claudia Cardinale.\r\n\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-320\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/claudia-C-1024x368.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"368\" \/>\r\n\r\nIt was Claudia Cardinale\u2019s photo that lead me to the most severe punishment of my childhood. Despite all the warnings, admonitions, and scoldings, women and cinema crept into my life. I never heard the end of the lectures and scoldings after they found her photo in my floorboards.\r\n\r\nEven though I can never claim myself as an accomplished spiritual person, at least I have a connection to the Buddha and the dharma. I like to think that through my crushes on Zeenat Aman and Claudia Cardinale they might also be connected to the Buddha and the dharma eventually.\r\n\r\n<img class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-321\" src=\"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/8k95w1iix2dz-1024x529.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"529\" \/>","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"project_category":[32],"project_tag":[],"class_list":["post-2662","project","type-project","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","project_category-episodes-es"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/project\/2662","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/project"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/project"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2662"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/project\/2662\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/890"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2662"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"project_category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/project_category?post=2662"},{"taxonomy":"project_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mugwortborn.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/project_tag?post=2662"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}